Independence Day 2020

Independence Day is going to be a little screwed up this year with no large gatherings and most of the big firework displays being shut down, but don’t panic! Remember, you survived the great toilet paper scare of 2020 and the scary murder hornets, you can get through anything!

The only thing Americans have seemed to agree on this year was that Carol Baskin killed her husband; let’s all unite and agree there are still plenty of ways you can celebrate and stay safe. Granted, it may not be ideal but dammit, even if you live alone, you owe it to yourself and your Country to get out there (in your backyard) and party like it’s 2019!

While you’re having all this quarantine holiday fun, don’t forget to take care of those lovely locks. If you’re grilling or setting off fireworks, do not – I repeat – DO NOT set your hair on fire. Happy Fourth of July, you handsome devils. Whatever you choose to do to celebrate the ratification of the Declaration of Independence this year, stay safe and stay Out of Regz.

From all of us, Happy Independence Day.